Feeling Weird?

Hey guys, if you felt a little woozy coming into the room last night, just know that you're not alone. It's kind of an ominous feeling to go "okay... we're about to unearth all the stuff I've spent 25+ years trying to stuff down? Yikes..." I get that. Also, please know that I haven't taught this stuff before, at least not like this, and sitting in front of 50 of you is also kind of unsettling for me. We're all a little wobbly in our gait right now, and it's cool.

I wanted to share an email I got from Brett Cassidy earlier today. He was also confessing some of what he was feeling, and I thought he put it well: "...I thought the singing at the front and end was great. I certainly felt the enemy organizing the underlings to combat the meeting. Personally, I was anxious, nervous and short of breath as I approached the room. I feel like I can see those little buggers jumping up and down on my chest, trying to keep me from feeling comfortable, and definitely from singing..."

Wow! I like the honesty! So guys, understand that worship IS warfare. When I say "this feels a little goofy to me, but I'm going to sing this song anyway...", I'm being a good soldier, there. When you get together in your small groups and say "okay, I barely know your name, but I'm going to tell you about the time I was molested and maybe you can pray with me..." you're GOING TO WAR. It matters, guys. BE BOLD. RUN HARD AFTER GOD. And, for God's sake, BE REPENTING LIONS.

Proverbs 28:1- THE RIGHTEOUS ARE BOLD AS A LION

Forgiveness

David Valentine sent me this song tonight. His iPod 'randomly' started playing this when he got into his car after the class tonight. Weird!

I think I might create a playlist for each stronghold we look at.



Mason Jennings, Forgiveness

Sitting on a bench in an old time station
Waiting for a train to forgiveness
I've brought no baggage, i've come here alone
Looking for a way to forgiveness
All these broken pieces of arrows in my side
I thought i could run with them, i know now i can't hide, so
I'm looking out upon the darkness down the tracks
Looking for the light of forgiveness
Call it bad company, call it what you will
My heart just won't let you go, i love you even still
Sadness and death, they both come along
So i sing this song called forgiveness
All these broken families, people taking sides
Hardly even bothered me, i never even cried, so
I'm crying on a bench in an old time station
Betting all i've got on forgiveness

BITTERNESS

Okay fellas.  You heard it.  Matthew 18 says we'll be "handed over to the torturers" if we don't forgive from our hearts.  So...

You got any questions?  Any comments?  Did any dots get connected for you?

I'll quote the great Don Henley:

What are these voices outside love's open door

That make us throw off our contentment and beg for something more?

I've been trying to get down/ to the heart of the matter

And my flesh gets weak/ and my thoughts seem to scatter

But I think it's about... forgiveness.

Healing is Hip!

Four years ago, I began experiencing severe hip pain – mostly when I walked.  I would take a step and as I planed my left foot, the pain would be so intense, it would almost bring me to my knees.  I went to an Orthopedic doctor and he x-rayed my hips, came into the exam room and said “you have the hips of an 80 year old man.  You should not run anymore or do anything strenuous.  Your only option is for me to do a total hip replacement.”  In shock and with a major eye-roll, I limped out of there as fast as I could.  I figured I would just have to live with the pain.  Maybe if I just stretched, it would feel better?  I did massage therapy.  I did physical therapy for a spell, it just didn’t seem to do any good.  I was 32 at the time.  Flash forward to last spring, while at the men’s retreat, a few of my new friends from San Diego put their hands on me and prayed – specifically for regeneration in my hip.  Instantly, I begin to feel this strange heat and warmth inside my upper thigh and hip.  I knew I was healed.  That warmth stayed with me for four days.  Fast forward to October ‘08, I started getting numbness (or a pins and needles feeling) behind my left knee.  I went to a different Orthopedic doctor, he x-rayed my hips, came back into the exam room and said...”what did you do? You have the hips of an 80 year old man. I see fractures, bone fragments, and arthritis (oh my)  What did you do?”  He sent me away to get an MRI and when I returned he offered, “looks like I’ll need to send you down for surgery you have a torn anterior labrum.  It’s not going to get any better.”  He sent me to get a 2nd MRI – I finally got this in a few weeks ago (March).  I went in to his office to get the results, he walked into the exam room with a curious look on his face.  He said “how do you feel?”  I told him “tight”.  He replied, “there’s a lot of this going on in the NFL now.  You have a hip impingement.  Carson had the same thing, did some therapy and was good as new in 2 months.  After a couple months of therapy, you should be as good as new.”  No need for surgery.  No need for a full hip replacement.  I don’t have the hips of an 80 year old man.      This outcome wasn’t the result of hours upon hours of work in the gym or ANYTHING I did.  I didn’t DO anything from October to March – much less 2005 to 2009.  This miraculous healing has happened because of the Lord’s loving kindness and his tender mercy. Over these 4 years, he has dealt with bitterness and rejection in me and delivered me. He just LOVES me and has driven these things out little by little.  He does what he says.  He is who he says he is.  He’s so good and so patient.  Praise God. 

-from David Russell

Small Group Info

What are we going to do in these groups?

You're going to respond individually to the stuff that gets taught.  At the lectures, we'll probably do some big, wholesale repenting--but you need to do some specific, 'retail' repenting, too.  Your small group is there to let you spill the beans of your story, confessing and repenting, then agree with you as you ask for healing.  They might just pray for you, too!  Nice.  

That's really it: say the last lecture was on fear.  So you walk in the door, having thought and prayed about it for a week, with a ready list of stuff you need to unload- events in your life where fear got a hold on you, and thought patterns you recognize in yourself that give place to fear.  You each tell your junk, repent before each other, and then confess God's truth over that issue.  Easy.  Okay, not easy, but simple and straightforward.  You can totally do this.

Who's leading these things, anyway?

Strictly speaking, the Holy Spirit will be leading the meetings.  Yes, there is a Point Man for each small group (really, just somebody that Tait can communicate with, for streamlining purposes), but that guy won't be 'running the meeting'.  You each have the responsibility to prepare for the meeting and come ready to share.  And each of you are going to have to be bold enough to tell the enemy to leave, ask the Holy Spirit to minister and, yes, to pray for each other.

Where are we meeting?

That's up to your small group.  If you have nowhere else to meet, you can meet at the Crossroads Atrium, but a park bench will work better, and a living room is best of all.  Think about it: you guys are going to be praying with each other, getting quite intimate and open, and you don't need to be somewhere where you've got to shout to be heard, or are going to feel conspicuous with your heads bowed or whatever you need to do.  Your group will decide on a place (again, somebody's home is best- why not rotate?) and a time (it doesn't HAVE to be Wednesdays at 7, but haven't you already got that time protected?).  Then you're on!

Can I skip the small groups and just come to the lectures?

You're asking if you can just get some info but wimp out at the personal risk of being real in front of some dudes who're in the same spot as you and just want to help one another get free.  Um, no you may not.  The point of the class isn't to Learn Cool Stuff, it's to get free and learn (by experience) how to deal with the enemy.  It's also a great crash course in ministering to each other, because that's what you'll be doing.  You can't learn that sitting alone, even if you've got a Bible with you.  We were made for community, and that's going to happen in this class.

You are really pretty good at answering my questions.

It's pretty easy, seeing as how we're the same person.  But thanks just the same.